I’ve drunk too much coffee this morning, so I’ll skip the introduction and just get to the job search tips …

1) Email
If you’re emailing your resume don’t neglect the subject line — along with the from: portion of your message, it’s the first thing employers see when your email arrives.

An article in The Tampa Tribune urges you to take the time to write a subject that gives a “compelling reason for the reader to open your e-mail.”

The article continues:

Unfortunately, most job seekers make the mistake of writing “John Smith — résumé” or worst (sic) yet just “résumé attached.” You must give the reader something of interest, ideally some glimpse into your specific expertise. Examples include:

- Nonprofit executive director with multimillion dollar fund raising experience

- Retail sales manager in Tampa

- Malcom Baldridge (sic) award-winning chief process engineer

Stay clear of non-descript (sic) subject lines such as: “Your perfect employee” or “Please read this.” Even avoid using an exclamation point, since many spam filters will redirect or automatically delete e-mails with this character.

2) Snail Mail
I spoke at the Minneapolis Star Tribune Career Fair two days ago and urged folks (as I’ll urge you) to use plain old paper mail, with a stamp, in addition to emailing your resume to employers. Although you make it easy for hiring managers to scan your resume into their tracking system when you email it, you also make it easy for them to delete and forget you.

But snail mail is different.

All employers were once children, and all children look forward to letters in the mail. Almost all adults still do, whether they realize it or not. That means, until you screw it up by writing a dull cover letter or resume, the hiring manager who gets yours in the mail will start reading with at least a tiny feeling of excitement and expectation. So you have that going for you, which is nice. Score one for snail mail.

More on how to use snail mail to get hired faster in the free Simple Job Search Manifesto.

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You’ve heard it said that no news is good news.

But there’s a corollary, equally true, with profound implications for your career.

It’s this: Most news is bad news, especially when it comes to employment and the economy.

You can prove this for yourself right now. Take a look at CNN.com or FoxNews.com and you’ll likely see a mix of about 90% bad news (death, crime, recession, war, scandal, etc.) and 10% good news (deaf boy regains hearing, a water-skiing squirrel, etc.).

What does this mean for you and your job search?

There’s roughly a 90% chance that any news you read, hear or see today is going to be bad news. And, like radiation, long-term exposure will lead to health problems. In this case, your mental health will suffer from a steady diet of bad news.

Now. Should you stick your head in the sand and become ignorant about current events? No.

But, like a guy in a Hazmat suit carrying uranium rods around in a nuclear reactor, you should take precautions when handling the news, to avoid unhealthy over-exposure.

I submit that you can shield yourself from the ill effects of bad news simply by asking the right questions.

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The other day, I was reading an article over at ABC News about how to recession-proof your job.

There were some good points, like this one:

In a challenging economic climate, you might not be able to recession-proof your specific job, but you can definitely recession-proof your career. That means if you’re a mortgage lender and your company is in trouble, that job is likely impossible to save at this time, but that doesn’t mean your career is in the gutter …. Don’t panic; just get prepared.

But there was one glaring error, when the author offered examples of “resume templates that can help you to showcase your skills, abilities and accomplishments.” The link opened to show a functional resume format. You can view it here.

Yes, you can showcase your accomplishments by using a functional resume. You can also showcase your Italians suits or Rolex watches by selling them off the back of a truck. But, in either case, you’ll have trouble making the sale.

Why?

No competent recruiter or hiring manager I’ve met since 1996 will buy into the claims you make in a functional resume, because functional resumes are used by job seekers with something to hide. It’s like selling stuff from the back of a truck — smart people will know something’s wrong.

Functional resumes are used by job seekers who want to downplay a potential negative, like a firing, frequent job changes, gaps in employment or the like.

So, what’s the alternative? Actually, there are two …

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